Embarrassing Punishments Hurt Kids

By Rachael Rettner

Parents and teachers who try to make their kids behave by subjecting them to humiliating punishments are taking the wrong approach to discipline, experts say.

Just this month, a Florida teacher was suspended for making tardy students wear a wide-brimmed dog collar dubbed the “cone of shame.” And parents in Minnesota who were disappointed with their daughter’s grades were arrested after they shaved the 12-year old girl’s head and forced her to wear a diaper and run around outside.

While these cases are certainly extreme, experts say that any punishment that shames or embarrasses a child is not an effective way to discipline youngsters, and may cause long-term psychological damage.

“The research is pretty clear that it’s never appropriate to shame a child, or to make a child feel degraded or diminished,” said Andy Grogan-Kaylor, an associate professor of social work at the University of Michigan. Such punishments can lead to “all kinds of problems in the future,” Grogan-Kaylor said, including increased anxiety, depression and aggression.

Malicious punishments can also damage a parent’s relationship with their child, and lead to a cycle of bad behavior, experts say.

Instead, parents should use other discipline strategies, such as setting clear rules for kids and taking away privileges. Overall, parents should aim to create a supporting environment for their child.

“Positive things have a much more powerful effect on shaping behavior than any punishment,” Grogan-Kaylor said.

Damaging punishments

Out-of-the norm punishments can have social repercussions for children, said Jennifer Lansford, a research professor at Duke Univesity’s Center for Child and Family Policy. An odd punishment can make a child stand out, and provoke bullying, Lansford said.

In addition, children evaluate their own experiences in the context of what they see their peers experiencing, Lansford said. If children are disciplined in ways that are not condoned by society, “it can lead children to perceive they are personally rejected by their parents,” Lansford said.

Humiliating punishments can also disconnect parents from their children, making kids less likely to want to behave and do what their parents say, said Katharine Kersey, a professor of early childhood education at Old Dominion University in Norfolk, Va., and author of the upcoming book “101 Principles for Positive Guidance with Young Children” (Allyn & Bacon, August 2012).

“Each time we [embarrass children with a punishment] we pay a price, and we drive them away from us, and we lose our ability to be a role model for them,” Kersey said.

“When you disconnect from a child, he no longer wants to please you, he no longer wants to be like you. You’ve lost your power of influence over him,” Kersey said.

Children who are punished in these ways usually still commit the behavior, but do it behind their parents’ backs, Kersey said.

Better ways to discipline

To properly discipline a child, experts recommend the following:

• Focus on the positive — the behaviors you want to see more of — rather than the mistakes, Kersey said. “If a child is running, instead of saying stop running, you say use your walking feet,” Kersey said.
• Be proactive: establish rules you want your kids to follow, and be reasonable in your expectations, Lansford said.
• Listen to your kids: Often times, bad behavior is a mistake, Grogan-Kaylor said. Parents should listen to why their children did something, and explain why the behavior is inappropriate.
• Timeouts are appropriate for younger kids. For older kids, taking away privileges such as watching TV may be effective, Lansford said. In a classroom setting, teachers may consider rewarding kids for good behavior, Lansford said.
• Parent should model the responsible behaviors they want children to repeat, Kersey said.

Pass it on:  Humiliating punishments don’t work to discipline children, and may have long-term consequences.

Source: http://www.myhealthnewsdaily.com/2584-embarrassing-punishments-children-discipline.html?utm_source=Newsletter&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=MHND_05152012

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America’s Hatred of Fat Hurts Obesity Fight

It may be the nation’s last, accepted form of prejudice. But the stigmatization of obesity has repercussions beyond the pain it inflicts on its targets: It threatens to impede efforts to fight the obesity epidemic.

Read more: www.msnbc.msn.com

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12 Tips to Navigate Summertime When Your Child Has ADHD

By MARGARITA TARTAKOVSKY, MS

Parenting a child with ADHD can be especially tough during the summer. “Kids with ADHD blossom when they have a structured schedule, and summertime is notorious for having a lack of scheduling,” according to Stephanie Sarkis, PhD, a psychotherapist and author of Making the Grade with ADD: A Student’s Guide to Succeeding in College with Attention Deficit Disorder.

Psychotherapist and ADHD expert Terry Matlen, ACSW, agreed. Because most parents can’t mimic the tight structure of school, kids often get bored — and may get into trouble, she said. That’s because when kids with ADHD get bored, they seek out stimuli, which can be anything from picking fights with their families to playing with fire, she said.

Some parents discontinue their child’s medication during the summer, which poses another challenge, said Matlen, also author of Survival Tips for Women with ADHD. “That can create a situation where the child has a hard time with self-control, mood regulation [and] social behaviors.”

But while the summer can be challenging, you can absolutely overcome these obstacles and enjoy a fun break. Below, Sarkis and Matlen offer their excellent suggestions.

1. Create Structure

Again, structure keeps your child focused. You can create structure by engaging your child in activities at the same time each day or meeting on the same day each week.

Because ADHD runs in families, one of you may have ADHD as well, making it harder to establish structure. Enlist the help of your non-ADHD spouse to assist with planning out the day.

2. Incorporate Physical Activities

Physical activities are especially helpful for kids who are impulsive and hyperactive. It helps them direct their energies in acceptable, healthy ways. If your child is clumsy, try non-competitive activities such as swimming, running and biking. (Some kids with ADHD have fine and gross motor skills that may not be on par with others their age.)

3. Start a Rotating Playgroup

Sarkis suggested that parents set up a weekly playgroup with other parents around their neighborhood. You can meet once a week at a different home for a few hours. This is an inexpensive way of providing structure to a child, and it also giving parents time off in the process.

4. Consider Camps

According to Matlen, young kids do great in day camps that offer outdoor, structured activities, while overnight camps with physical outlets are ideal for older kids. If your child has a specific interest, such as art, horses or computers, specialized camps are another excellent option, she said.

Both Sarkis and Matlen also suggested camps for kids with ADHD. To find a camp, contact your local CHADD group or post on an ADHD forum, Sarkis said. “Look in your local paper, and ask your pediatrician, teacher, or school counselor,” she added.

(Also, this article has several helpful suggestions on finding a good camp.)

5. Try Local Facilities

If camp isn’t feasible, try a local swim club or the Y, Matlen said. These facilities offer an array of fun activities at an affordable cost.

6. Get Creative

Parents can also set up a badminton set in the backyard, purchase a trampoline [or] set up an obstacle course with tunnels and objects to hop over.

7. Engage Them in Nature

For instance, show your kids how to garden. Kids can get dirty while learning about nature. Also, setting up bird feeders and tending to the food gives kids the opportunity to learn how to care for living creatures.

8. Visit the Library

Kids with the inattentive type of ADHD often prefer quiet and calm activities. During the summer, many libraries offer either free or low-cost programs for kids.

9. Check out the Arts

Kids who prefer quieter activities also might enjoy attending concerts, plays and art classes.

10. Encourage Older Kids to Work

If your kids are older, talk to them about the many ways they can earn money, such as dog walking, pet sitting or even having a lemonade stand. This improves math skills and promotes a healthy independence and solid self-esteem.

11. Let Your Child Have a Say

Ask your child what they’d like to do this summer, including the new skills they’d like to learn, such as playing the guitar, camping or cooking. Once he sees that he has input and that his opinion is valued, the parent has a much better chance at getting him to try new things.

If your child already has a certain skill, ask if they’d be willing to teach that skill to a younger child. According to Matlen, this can “do wonders for his self-esteem, which for many kids, can get pretty battered during the school year.”

12. Consult your Doctor about Medication

Some parents take their kids off medication during the summer since there’s no schoolwork. However, it’s important to thoroughly discuss this decision with your child’s doctor, Matlen said. She’s seen kids significantly struggle without their medication. For instance, because of their hyperactivity and impulsivity, they may lose friends, she said. And their behaviors might cause tremendous stress on the family.

In addition to creating structure and engaging your child in a variety of enjoyable activities, don’t forget to find some alone time for yourself, Sarkis added.

Source: http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/05/14/12-tips-to-navigate-summertime-when-your-child-has-adhd/H

 

DSM Panel Holds Firm on New Autism Diagnosis

By Eric Palmer

A panel of psychiatrists revising the influential Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders are holding firm to their streamlined diagnosis for autism but are backing off proposals for changes to some others.

How the definitions turn out in the fifth edition of the DSM when it is published next year has huge implications for the pharmaceutical industry, which has reaped huge returns from doctors turning to drugs more often for treatments. Drug treatments for autism are seen to have great potential in the market, for example, so how the manual ends up on that diagnosis is being closely monitored by the industry.

The doctors said evidence did not support creation of the diagnoses “attenuated psychosis syndrome” or “mixed anxiety depressive disorder.” The first is supposed to identify anyone at risk of developing psychosis, while the second was seen as a hybrid of anxiety and depression, reports The New York Times.

They also made some changes to the definition of depression so that people experiencing the kind of common sadness anyone might experience after an event such as a death in the family were not diagnosed with a mental condition.

Dr. David J. Kupfer, who is leading the group revising the manual, said there was a decision that some proposed diagnoses needed further study after reviews of field trials on whether different doctors would reach a diagnosis in the same way.

“Our intent for disorders that require more evidence is that they be studied further, and that people work with the criteria,” and refine them, said Kupfer who also is a professor of psychiatry at the University of Pittsburgh.

The proposed definition of autism–which eliminates related labels like Asperger’s syndrome and “pervasive developmental disorder”–has been hotly debated. In January, Yale University researchers presented evidence that about half of the people with the diagnosis who are considered high-functioning would no longer qualify under the new diagnosis and so lose certain treatment benefits. That was countered, however, this week at the association’s annual meeting when new data showed that few children would be affected by the change.
Read more: DSM panel holds firm on new autism diagnosis, ditches 2 other revisions – FiercePharma http://www.fiercepharma.com/story/dsm-panel-holds-firm-autism-diagnosis-ditches-two-others/2012-05-09#ixzz1uOfL5M27

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Should Addicts be Sterilized?

Project Prevention has long paid poor, addicted women not to procreate. Now the far right is helping it go global.

BY JED BICKMAN, THE FIX

A volunteer outside a Project Prevention van

“Don’t let a pregnancy ruin your drug habit,” the slogan on the fliers reads. Another says, “She has her daddy’s eyes…and her mommy’s heroin addiction.” Then: “Get birth control, get ca$h.” These are posters that show up nationwide in homeless shelters and methadone clinics, in AA and NA meeting rooms and near needle exchange programs, distributed by volunteers for Project Prevention. Formerly called Children Requiring a Caring Kommunity (CRACK), the controversial nonprofit pays drug addicts $300 to either undergo sterilization or use a form of long-term, “no responsibility needed” birth control.

“What makes a woman’s right to procreate more important than the right of a child to have a normal life?” Project Prevention founder Barbara Harris told Time magazine in 2010. The question is entirely rhetorical: her self-professed mission in life is to zero out the number of births to parents who abuse illegal drugs, particularly crack cocaine. “Even if these babies are fortunate enough not to have mental or physical disabilities, they’re placed in the foster-care system and moved from home to home,” she says.

Critics of many stripes have piled on. They argue that Harris’ campaign deprives women who are addicted, poor and vulnerable of reproductive choice even as it feeds their drug habit.

Some opponents say that, since the financial incentive is tantamount to giving addicts money to buy drugs, Project Prevention should be illegal.

Others say that if addicted women are viewed as not responsible enough to have a baby, then they should also be viewed as not responsible enough to give informed consent to having a serious medical procedure in exchange for drug money.

Still others say that Harris is stuck in the past by targeting the wrong drugs: these days, more babies are born dependent on Oxy and other legal opiate painkillers than cocaine or heroin, according to a report published just this week in JAMA.

And many opponents say that the payment is a bribe, and some have even called Project Prevention a revival of the eugenics movement.

Harris takes none of these criticisms seriously. The California foster mother, age 59, started the program in 1997, following her failed effort to get the Prenatal Neglect Act through the California state legislature. The bill would have made it a crime for a pregnant woman to use illegal drugs. (Such laws exist in many states: last week’s Sunday New York Times Magazine profiled an Alabama woman named Amanda Kimbrough who is serving 10 years in prison for doing crystal meth while pregnant and giving birth after only 25 weeks to a very underweight baby who died.) Shifting tactics, the homegrown activist then began her campaign for a less punitive, if more final, solution to the “problem” of drug-addicted mothers bringing children into the world: pay them not to procreate.

Read more: http://www.salon.com/2012/05/02/should_addicts_be_sterilized_salpart/singleton/